Thanks for sharing! I had quite forgotten that I wrote this article some time ago. Yes, my views still stand. I am grateful for the opportunity to bond with my girls.

Of course, every family situation is different. You have to see what fits yours best. Whatever it is, we certainly need to be fully present when our kids are around – without our mind running off somewhere else. I am glad to know that your decision resonates well with you.

Wishing you love, joy and peace,
Evelyn

Your article really helped me. Im a mom of a beautiful 14 month old baby girl named Chloe and she is my everything. I reciently had the hard decision of going back to work after mat leave or staying home with her. I wanted more then anything in the world to stay home with her but my husband and i wouldnt have been able to survive off of his job alone. He’s in school to become a doctor and extremely busy so working more was not an option. I did go back to work for a few weeks but I found it too hard. Finally I decided that maybe i should go back to school so thats what i did. I see chloe alot more then i would have had i gone back to work. there are only two days of the week where we are in need of a babysitter and then my mom is there to help. As i was saying though… your article really helped me. i have to write a paper for school and i decided to write it on Maternity leave and why its important and why it should be longer. Why its importatnt for mothers to raise their own children ect. so i just wanted to say thank you

Hi Charly,

It is wonderful that you made cards and mailed them to your kids. It is an act of love, that I’m convinced they will remember.

I’ve not had that when I was young. As with many Asian families, I did not get any hugs nor kisses nor cards. My mum was also working. So I never had any memory of time spent together. I don’t blame her, however. Times were hard then. And she probably didn’t know how to show love to her kids, having also suffered the same in her childhood.

I’ve resolved to do things differently for my kids. They are hugged, smothered in kisses, and talked to every day. Hopefully, they’ll grow up nicely too!

Thanks so much for your nice feedback. I really appreciate it.

With much love,
Evelyn

I managed though and I managed by making time in my schedule for my children and doing special things. I used to do things like buying cards and mailing them to the children at work, especially when they were learning to read. They loved it! I remember doing this one day and the receptionist asking whether my kids were twins and if it was their birthday. She was flabbergasted that I would just send the kids a card or a letter, just because.

Thank you for sharing – you’ve done extremely well.

I hope to do things differently for my kids. Despite my parents’ disappointment that I am not “working” a normal full time job, I’ve decided that what’s best for my kids is someone who is there when they get back from school.

Anthony, yes I can certainly identify with that. It’s hard to ignore them when they look so adorable while demanding some attention from you.

Dr James, thank you for sharing your wisdom. It is so true, what you said. While I love my kids, it took me so long to come to terms with being less selfish and becoming more aware of my role as a mother. While I am not perfect, I hope to be an important role model for them. You are right…..my kids have been brought to me for a learned experience. I’ve not grown up so much if it had never been for them.

With much gratitude,
Evelyn